Wernham Hogg Forum

SpecialNeedsChild · Wed Jul 12, 2006 2:48 am 'Mop & Bucket, Aisle Three'

So, I've got a funny story for y'all. Now, I'm a part-time checkout chick. On Sunday night, this bloke came through my register with three items. One was a packet of shoelaces and the other two were enormous plastic bottles. The shoelaces scanned fine, so I popped them in the bag, making chit-chat, blah blah blah.

THEN, the first of these bottles scanned as 'Unknown'. Meaning, I had to alert the supervisor, so she could check the price. So, I had a closer look at the product, and it was, yes, a HUGE bottle of personal lubricant. Nice, huh? So, he had not one, but two of these bottles. And I had to stand there making awkward conversation while I waited for the supervisor to come back.

THEN, once they'd been added to his docket (@ $6.76 each, in case you're interested), he realised he didn't have enough cash. "Oh, I'll have to take something off." So, he subtracts THE SHOELACES. Obviously, he URGENTLY needed TWO massive bottles of lubricant.

Perhaps you had to be there.
:D :D :D :D

BILLY V2.0 · Wed Jul 12, 2006 3:08 am

Haha, christ. I used to work in a supermarket for 3 years and I hated serving people when they bought things like condoms, bras, etc. It was just so awkward. Having to scrunch my eyes up to read the tiny tag on a piece of lingerie because the barcode didn't work...humiliating.

Dananiel · Wed Jul 12, 2006 2:15 pm

I didn't know you could buy massive bottles of lubricant. I think if you're buying that much, you step out of the realms of wanking and into an altogether seedier place.

SpecialNeedsChild · Fri Jul 14, 2006 4:24 am

Yeah, I didn't know that either! And, from a supermarket (??)! It's so wrong. I mean, a tube, sure...but...a bottle. Unless he was planning to host a KY-Wrestling Match, I really can't see the point.

BILLY V2.0 · Sat Jul 15, 2006 3:28 pm

They might be shooting a porno. I saw a great one once where they greased this Asian woman up so she was literally wearing a KY exterior, and just slid her along the floor to eachother. She was going all over the place.

Dananiel · Sat Jul 15, 2006 3:39 pm

Kind of like a porno version of It's A Knockout.

BILLY V2.0 · Sat Jul 15, 2006 3:44 pm

I knocked a few out to it, I can tell you.

Dananiel · Sat Jul 15, 2006 3:50 pm

To It's A Knockout? Chegwin?

RChappo · Sat Jul 15, 2006 4:04 pm

Billy wrote: They might be shooting a porno. I saw a great one once where they greased this Asian woman up so she was literally wearing a KY exterior, and just slid her along the floor to eachother. She was going all over the place.

I think I've seen that one as well.

Daaaaaaan wrote: Kind of like a porno version of It's A Knockout.

Billy wrote: I knocked a few out to it, I can tell you.

:lol: :lol:

Classic!
Billy you're on fire today my friend!

SpecialNeedsChild · Mon Jul 17, 2006 3:37 am

That 'Porno Version of It's A Knockout' is just about the funniest thing I've ever read, here.

Pah. · Tue Jul 18, 2006 9:28 pm

you dont read a lot of stuff here then?

Delphi · Sat Jul 22, 2006 2:24 am Re: 'Mop & Bucket, Aisle Three'

SpecialNeedsChild wrote: So, I've got a funny story for y'all. Now, I'm a part-time checkout chick. On Sunday night, this bloke came through my register with three items. One was a packet of shoelaces and the other two were enormous plastic bottles. The shoelaces scanned fine, so I popped them in the bag, making chit-chat, blah blah blah.

THEN, the first of these bottles scanned as 'Unknown'. Meaning, I had to alert the supervisor, so she could check the price. So, I had a closer look at the product, and it was, yes, a HUGE bottle of personal lubricant. Nice, huh? So, he had not one, but two of these bottles. And I had to stand there making awkward conversation while I waited for the supervisor to come back.

THEN, once they'd been added to his docket (@ $6.76 each, in case you're interested), he realised he didn't have enough cash. "Oh, I'll have to take something off." So, he subtracts THE SHOELACES. Obviously, he URGENTLY needed TWO massive bottles of lubricant.

Perhaps you had to be there.
:D :D :D :D

:lol: Sounds like something from a movie...I know I have seen this before!!! Props to that guy though for not giving a rats ass!!! LOL!

LDIF · Sat Jul 22, 2006 10:53 pm

Daaaaaaan wrote: Kind of like a porno version of It's A Knockout.

Lovely stuff.

COCKTEASE · Wed Jul 26, 2006 2:17 pm

i've not read any of this thread so what i post next might be irrelevant